08 June 2010

BlogHer10 Warm-Up

If you're going, you have two months before madness ensues.
If you're not, you have at least the next 3-4 months of pre-, during-, and post-blogher write-ups, angstfests, rants, SQUEEES, and etc.
Sorry about that.

I'm going, as I believe I've mentioned.

This year I'm mic wrangling, so I might trip over you and fall face first into your crotch, or, alternatively, spontaneously lose control of my arms and fling the microphone at your head.  Those are my current what-if-this-all-goes-horribly-wrong anxiety inducing scenarios.
Welcome to my brain.
When I was live blogging the sessions last year, I obsessively imagined a world wherein I developed Typing Tourettes and all of my posts were strings of expletives and then BlogHer got mad at me and took my nametag and made me leave.
(That didn't happen.)
Hopefully the Face-to-Crotch Fall won't happen either.  And hopefully I won't give you a black eye with the microphone.
I am ever hopeful.

Things That I'll Do Differently This Year:
*Wear shoes for at least 30% more time than last year.  I figure that commits me to 3-4 daylight hours where I'm not barefoot.
*At times when I'm not wearing shoes, have a pair in my purse, just in case.  It was super awesome last year when I got to meet interesting, professional people whom I admire, and I wasn't wearing shoes.
*Don't punch a baby.  Or, excuse me, elbow anyone's baby.  Especially not for a swag bag.  Unless it's like, a new car or $1000 cash money or something.  Would I punch a baby for money?  I dunno, I'm not making promises.
*Leave the hotel.  Last year, I left the hotel once on Thursday morning for breakfast, once on Friday night to go to the Nikon party, once on Saturday night to go to the bowling party thingie, and zero times ever to do anything that wasn't BlogHer party related.  This time around, I'd like to....leave? Maybe? Once? Twice?  I'll make it a broad goal, so I don't disappoint myself.
*Don't get completely falling down smashfaced wasted at the Sparklecorn party.  Nope, not making any promises for any of the other social events.  This will have to do.

Things That You Should Know About Me:
(I'll repeat this closer to the date, I promise)
*I'm nearsighted and I don't wear contacts, so if I'm not wearing my glasses, you can trust and believe that I can't really see.  So don't be offended if I don't make eye contact or something.
*That aside, even if I *am* wearing my glasses, I'm horribly bad with recognizing people, especially if I'm used to looking at their twitter icon.
*Say hi to me!  If you want to.
*I'm a blogger.  It should come as absolutely no surprise to you that I'm SOCIALLY AWKWARD.
*I also have the tendency to wander off in the middle of conversations.
*Say hi to me!
*I will be representing Blue Duckling while I'm there (more on that later and over here), and will have some small samples on hand to give out, if you want them.  I promise not to be an infomercial or spammy or obnoxious or rude.  But I'll have some pretty smelling stuff and some discounts for a pretty kickass company run by a good friend of mine.  If you're interested.
*Did I already say the thing about saying hi to me?

Things That You Should Definitely Do:
*Say hi to me!
*Attend the community keynote.
*Bring business cards or equivalent, with your name, blog info, etc.
*Don't be assy or rude.
*Don't be offended.
*Don't be shy.
*If you're representing a company, don't be spammy or obnoxious or do something that will make me want to stab you.
*In general, avoid behavior that will make people want to stab you.
*Don't worry so much.
*Have fun!