15 December 2009

Saturday in Vegas, would you like to know it?

-At roughly 11am, I jolted awake and demanded to know the time. Then I groaned. Audibly.
What time did we go to bed?
You passed out at 6, after declaring that we were all assholes.
Oh. Huh.
I think I drank my weight in vodka yesterday.
-Stumbled into clothes.
-Found my phone, possessed by Satan.  It flashes the word "gravity" on and off.  And that is all it does.  Eventually I decided that 'gravity' is probably the name of the phone model. otherwise I have NO EARTHLY IDEA.
-Food Court! Again!
-INSERT TIME LAPSE (Did we nap again??) Julia keeps offering me her blackberry to make contact with ANY OF THE OTHER PEOPLE IN VEGAS. I use it to tweet nonsense and make no contact whatsoever.
-Went as group to eat, and then did minor sight seeing.  Tammi, Greg and a Aman went off to see Blue Man Group.
So. At this point I finally FINALLY start to wake up. (it's 9pm? Later? Earlier?) Anyhow, brain starts functioning, somewhat, and I realize that I can probably buy a pay as you go phone from Walgreen's, which is handily staring at me.
This Walgreen's doesn't have T-Mobile prepaid phones, there is another one on the other end of the strip, they call, they have it, we take THE LONGEST AND MOST FRIGHTENING CAB IN THE HISTORY OF MAN.  Our geriatric cab driver shows us the ticket he got the night prior, because it is so long. Yes the physical length of the ticket.  He also chides us for our store choice. How about CVS? Wal-Mart sure is a great store.
Walgreen's II is significantly creepier than Walgreen's I.  Waiting for someone to get a phone for me, I inadvertently make eye contact with the store security guard. WHO IS A ZOMBIE.  He has hollow eyes, a hunched lean, grey dead skin, and fingernails caked in grave dirt.  I lean over to Julia, "Look! A zombie!"
"OH MY GOD" (to Steve, whispering) "The security guard is-"
"A zombie? Yes. I saw."
We made Steve ask the zombie for scissors.
Later zombie sitings included:
In the elevator lobby of Planet Hollywood.
Walking down the strip by myself at 3am.
Standing, murmuring and groaning and staring hollowly, at the base of the escalator in the Las Vegas Airport.
Ground zero for Zombie Armageddon is, apparently, Las Vegas, NV. I guess The Bloggess was right.
-After I acquired PHONE! we went into the MGM to do some gambling, and I won $50ish at the nickel slots, which paid for PHONE!  Then we walked down to Planet Hollywood for #VegasBB, which was awesome and fun and BEWBS!
-After party got shut down, walked back to Palazzo by myself, asked a cop what side of the street I needed to be on.  A tall, manly cop.  He answered me in the voice of a woman.
-Found Julia and Steve eating fried food. Partook.

Some Weekend Pictures, for your viewing pleasure:

Some Karaoke and OH MAN were we ever into it.

Drinks on plane so as not to die.

The part of the trip where Aman gave me a wedgie and almost killed me.

Me, Dying.  Aman, Smirking.


With Tammi and inexplicably purple.

Aman and Steve having a moment.

I think Julia wants to kill me and my camera. Kill me bad.

I'm pretty sure we're dancing on a table in La Chez Queen of Spain

All photos here.