19 January 2017

Assortment of Episodes

Sitting at my desk this afternoon, I picked up my bottle of juice, and gave it a shake before I took a sip. Except the cap wasn't screwed on, so I just covered myself and all of my work surfaces in juice. It was a nice, vigorous shake.

Last night, I had Everett on my lap, and I noticed that his ear was red. A few minutes later, I thought, I'd better check and make sure there's not a bug in there or something. THERE WAS A TICK IN HIS EAR. It was burrowed right into the fold. We had to hold him down and hold him still and dig in there with tweezers and it was very traumatic for all involved. We soothed him with cheese. THERE MIGHT BE A BUG IN YOUR EAR. 

Last week I bought myself lunch and then I needed to go to Target so I drove over there and was sitting in the parking lot, eating alone in my car before I went in for errands. My mouth was full of Thai Chicken Wrap when a lady opened up my trunk and started loading her bags into the car. I was still trying to swallow when she opened up the back door and flung her purse on the seat. I was just getting ready to say something when she opened up the driver's side door and got ready to sit down on me. It was just then, and not a moment before, that this woman (on her cell phone) saw me. Her eyes got big, she ended her call, she backed away sputtering. I think we both wanted to disappear into the ground. Except, she had to regather her things, so our interaction went on a bit longer than preferred. After she was fully extracted from my vehicle and into her own, wherever that may have been, I looked around the parking lot. There were ZERO other cars of my make and model in the lot. NONE.

2 comments:

  1. OMG OMG and OMG. That lady! I bet I'll do that at some point in my life.

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  2. So much "Whaaaaaatttt???" from me as I read this!

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