04 February 2013

Shorter Super Bowl

- The 49ers forgot that they had a game so a ragtag band of noble fans stood in as replacements and tried to do their best.

- Their best was not, unfortunately, on par with professional football players.

- While the Niners were losing everything, Beyonce was winning at EVERYTHING.

- Then Ray Lewis killed the lights.

- This time it was rich white folks trapped in the Superdome, so people CARED about that shit.

- During the blackout, someone flew the Niners in and got them onto the field.

- It almost worked.

- Except then it didn't.

- I would TOTALLY go see The Fast & The Furious XIII.

- Gabriel almost started crying when, as I was picking him up after the game, his dad said something about rooting for the Ravens.

- "But dad! You SAID you were rooting for my team!!!"

- PBS has a better social media manager than you.

- Ibid, Oreo.

- Is the crushing sense of defeat worse when you are given some last minute hope to cling to?

- Not worse than being crushingly defeated, no.