28 January 2013


Gabriel's birthday was Saturday.
He went to his basketball game in the morning, where his dad met him and took him up until the time of his party in the afternoon.
He had a roller skating party for the second year in a row, which I highly recommend for the following reasons:
- Comparative to other party venues, it's cheap.
- You don't have to clean up before or after.
- There is a built in activity, meaning that you don't have to organize children.
- It is a defined time period.
After that we went clothes shopping, out to dinner, and then home to open his presents from me. Giving Gabriel gifts is deeply pleasing because OH MY GOD MOM THIS IS MY FAVORITE THING AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THAT I WANTED IT HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT I WANTED THIS I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW OH MY GOD I LOVE IT THANK YOU SO MUCH YOU'RE THE BEST.
It is a very satisfying response to giving gifts.

While I find that birthdays are very hard on children, and they're often impossible brats, Gabriel was in a good mood and nice and not  insufferable for the entirety of Saturday.
He made up for this by having a very difficult day yesterday.
"Gabriel had a very difficult day yesterday" is parent code for "My child was a tremendous asshole." I firmly believe that at some point ALL parents WANT to beat their children.
What's separating us from them is that instead of throwing a shoe as hard as I could at my son's head, I locked myself in my room for ten minutes while we all Tried To Calm Down.

I went to the grocery store last night and I left Gabriel with my parents (we were taking a break from each other, after I so nobly resisted flinging a shoe at his head).
Because I was Taking A Break, I sat in my car and fiddled for quite some time both before and after the trip to extend it a bit, and I walked up and down every single aisle of the store, instead of just the aisles where I planned to buy things.
Did you know that the 'hispanic foods' aisle includes an entire refrigerator section full of Tampico? I might have put that in the 'frat party' section of the store, if there was such a thing. It would also include red SOLO cups, condoms, and rohypnol. 

23 January 2013

2013 Wishes

I hesitate to call these resolutions, as some of them have nothing to do with me or my behavior, but here are some wishes I have for 2013.

- I hope that 2013 is the year that I actually stop hearing from that-ex-who-gets-creepier-every-time-he-contacts-me-or-leaves-things-for-me-on-my-doorstep. I have reasonable hopes for this one, as he doesn't know where I live anymore, and I think he's finally blocked across all avenues of communication.

- I really really really want the 49ers to win the Super Bowl.

- CPA license? I have one more exam to pass, and assuming I do, I can send all my paperwork into the state in August. Let's assume that I do. That's a hope. I hope that I do. Assume nothing!

- Let's make passing that fourth CPA exam an official wish/resolution.

- Finish knitting the hat I started before busy season started, make a non-hat garment (could be for myself or someone else).

- Go on vacation.

- Live through busy season.

- Return this pair of shoes to Zappos before the 365 day expiration date on my ability to do that.

- Hang the rest of my curtains.

- Put up this extremely pain in the ass and messy looking window film stuff that I bought.

- Finish painting my half-painted bathroom.

- Take some pictures (I'm not going to hem myself in with a QUANTITY GOAL) with my Real Actual Camera.

- Finish the tattoo I started 4 or 5 or god knows how many years ago (I actually have an appointment to do so, making this goal pretty attainable).

- Try to be less standoffish with and mean to boys.

- However, also: Maybe punch the next douchebag I meet right in the crotch.

- Put some pictures on my walls.

- Fix my broken shoe rack.

- This is really turning into more of a house To Do List, isn't it?

- But this feels like stuff that will LIKELY take me all year to get to.

- I still have boxes that I need to unpack, you know.

- Unpack the rest of my boxes!

- Organize Gabriel's room situation (he has a room SITUATION).

- Pay more attention to my cat.

- Get some sleep.

- See my friends.

- This got boring.

- I think I'm going to hit publish now.

22 January 2013

2012, or whatever

1. What did you do in 2012 that you’d never done before?
Got a degree in accounting, drove on a field trip, took Gabriel on an airplane (took Gabriel on vacation), stayed with someone I had never met in real life prior to staying with them, started my new job.  

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
My new years resolutions were have more sex and make morally unambiguous choices.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
I have two adorable baby nieces born this year, Susannah and June.  

4. Did anyone close to you die?
No, thankfully.  

5. What countries did you visit?
The United States of America.  

6. What would you like to have in 2013 that you lacked in 2012?
Money, time, whomp whomp.  

7. What dates from 2012 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
July 22 - Susannah!
October 5 - June!
July 6 - My last day of classes EVER (I hope).  

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Master's degree 2.0, got the job I wanted, passed 3 of my 4 CPA exams.  

9. What was your biggest failure?
Failing 1 of my 4 CPA exams, feeling like a shitty friend, having a lot of bad things happen to my people, discovering panic attacks.  

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I went off an anxiety cliff in August based on various THINGS.
And I got the flu. The real INFLUENZA flu.
I thought I was going to die.  

11. What was the best thing you bought?

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Gabey! I know he's mine and I'm biased but he really is an excellent child. Even though he's also a brat. We've had a lot of big changes this year and I'm working long hours and he's just been wonderful.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Various people who it turns out are all woman-blamey when it comes to assault.
This douchebag who dicked around one of my friends and then went on a weird anti-me campaign.
A couple guys who were dicks to me.  

14. Where did most of your money go?
Living my life or whatever.  

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
East coast visit! Reading Gabriel chapter books, how much Gabriel loves reading, Hawaii, graduating, paychecks, NIECES.  

16. What song will always remind you of 2012?
Some combination of Carly Rae Jepson and Drake.   

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? Happier, I think. Maybe about the same feelings-wise but on an overall happiness trajectory.
b) thinner or fatter? Thinner? I'm not sure. I think I'm actually the same but I feel a lot better about my body.
c) richer or poorer? Richer, but only in that I have an income.  

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

20. How did you spend Christmas?
With family.
(I originally filled out this survey in an email for my friend Molly. This response was EDITED).  

21. Did you fall in love in 2012?
I dunno.  

22. What was your favorite TV program?
Girls, Game of Thrones, and I'm totally late to the party but I just recently discovered and am in love with The League.  

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
I have made some strong FEELINGS RE-ALLIANCES, yes.  

24. What was the best book you read?
The sequel to Daughter of Smoke and Bone, the name of which I cannot remember.  

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?
The Avett Brothers  

26. What did you want and get?
A job, a degree.  

27. What did you want and not get?

28. What was your favorite film of this year?
The Hunger Games or The Batman movie, which I'm pretty sure are the only two films I SAW this year.  

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 30. I worked, it was a Wednesday. My mom made me dinner. Boring, boring.  

30. What is one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
A housekeeper.  

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2012?
Professional Hobo  

32. What kept you sane?
Wine, coffee.

 33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
I dunno. Anderson Cooper?
Random fact: I JUST THIS WEEK discovered that Channing Tatum is a guy? I mean, I hadn't really tried to find out or looked at a picture or anything but my eyes happened to be on the television when someone said his name and it was like...whoa. I have been hearing that name all year and just been operating on the ASSUMPTION that we were all talking about a lady.  

34. What political issue stirred you the most?
The election, particularly watching all election coverage on Fox News. OMG.  

35. Who did you miss?
My friends. Gabriel.  

36. Who was the best new person you met?
I have some pretty epically good new coworkers.

 37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2012.
My friends put up with me, so they must really love me.  

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
So, I gathered up my savvy
Bought myself a business suit

15 January 2013

A Preponderance of Gifts

So Gabriel's birthday is coming up, and I bought him things.
The following things, specifically, if you are interested, or perhaps searching for what to buy a 7-year-old boy.
If your 7-year-old is like mine.
Which he (or she) might be. 
Sleeping Bag
I bought this over the summer because Gabriel doesn't have a sleeping bag and it seems like the sort of thing that Little Boys Need, but I never gave it to him, and then I didn't give it to him for Christmas either, so now I'm giving it to him for his birthday.
I have very fond memories of tenting up in the field as a kid. We live near some prime tenting fields. We also don't own a tent. Also, it goes nicely with the sleeping bag.
I don't really feel this warrants explanation. I got him the size 5 one cuz that's the size they play with on his basketball team.
The Flight of Dragons
I really, really loved this movie when I was a kid. It is paired in my mind with The Last Unicorn, but the copy at our video rental place was at some point irreparably damaged so I saw this one a lot less and therefore have always coveted it a lot more. This is more of a share-my-childhood-with-my-child gift than anything else. It's about falling into a dragon board game and trying to save the good dragons from the fourth evil dragon brother/emperor/something?? The details are fuzzy.
StarFox 64 3D
Bought this on internet recommendations based on Gabriel's love of Kid Icarus and Lego Star Wars.
No Roses for Harry!
Harry by the Sea
I like to buy Gabriel books, he likes Harry books, I don't mind listening to him read them to me. Boom.
LEGO Space Bug Obliterator
Gabriel has specifically requested Legos for his birthday, and he spent his Christmas money from his great-grandmother on some other parts of this set, and this is his first 'big' Lego set.

I had a lot of fun shopping for Gabriel this year.

I also bought hims some clothes, but he really just needs clothes, so while I'm going to add them to his presents so he can open a great mountain of gifts like the spoiled child that he is, I don't count those as birthday presents so much as things I have to buy my child.

03 January 2013

Sick Forever

I feel like I've been sick forever. I was off work from 12/20 through to yesterday. In my mind this was to be a glorious two weeks of basking, holiday enjoyment, house fixing, fussing around, and so forth. In reality I got slammed with a head cold followed by a stomach bug followed by the return of the cold but more in the chestal region followed by I think maybe I have the flu.

The flu part is the worst part. I don't get sick very often, or stay sick for very long, and I haven't been this sick or sick for this long in years. Yesterday I spent a good portion of my work day trying Very Hard not to fall asleep.

I am fully aware that sick people shouldn't go to work and contaminate others but I had a moment of morning perkiness yesterday that got me into the office and didn't fall apart until I sat down at my desk. And then I was already AT work, which is really 2/3 of the going to work battle, and work is really far away from my home anyways, so at some point you're there and you're going to stay.

Today I'm at work again. I think that I might be slightly better because I feel less fluey but I also think that I might just be better medicated. It's difficult to tell.

Yesterday I bought DayQuil from Target that expired in July 2010. It is baffling to me that accidentally buying medication that expired 2.5 years ago is even an option. The other things I bought at Target include a space heater, two men's sweaters, fuzzy socks, and sweatpants. In case you were wondering what impulse purchases look like to the infirm.