14 July 2011

Who would have thought that bras were such a devisive issue?

ITEM THE FIRST

I'm still pretty stunned by the high asshole quotient on my illustrated guide to why bra shopping sucks.
I'll address some things:
-Yes, I know my bra size.
-Yes, I have breasts.
-It's okay if you personally do not have problems shopping for bras. That doesn't reflect any flaw with your character, nor do my problems reflect my own inability to put my body into a garment that fits me. People's bodies are different, yo. It doesn't matter what my official bra size is, my boobs are not perfect hemispheres. I'm almost 30, I spent a year and a half nursing a kid, and my tits were never that great to begin with. THAT IS OKAY. Chill the fuck out, y'all.
-I'm a moron. I'm 100% capable of misspelling shit, and I promise you that won't change. Doesn't matter how many pieces of paper I frame on my wall.
-I'm a shitty fucking artist. I THOUGHT THAT WAS CLEAR.

ITEM THE ALL THE OTHER ITEMS

I have three classes under my belt and I've so far managed to hang onto my 4.0. No thanks to my raging ADHD or my chronic laziness. I'm....not really sure how this happened.

I'm picking up Gabriel on Friday, and I'll have him through next Wednesday, when he goes back to his dad's for another nineish days. He's been asking to come home a lot, and I miss him like crazy, so I would love to just keep him through the rest of the summer, reverting back to our regular weekend switch off custody situation, but I'm trying to be fair. Gabriel will necessarily spend less time with his dad during the school year, because travel is harder on a kid in school. I'm clinging to my logical Fairness Doctrine. But oh, I miss that boy. I can't wait to see him.

I need a suit. As part of my new grown-up life. I don't.....look very good in suits. My waist is too small for my larger buttular region, so skirts ride up in an awkward and unflattering way. My legs are too short for my long torso, and dress pants look funny on me. Button-down shirts are ALWAYS too tight on my arms. If I talk about this later, please don't take it as an implied criticism of the ease with which you purchase your professional attire.

I very much need and want a vacation. There is no vacation in sight.

I am currently in a course covering the legal and ethical environment of professional accounting. To say I'm having trouble focusing would be quite the understatement.

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