I spent my Sunday visiting Gabriel in Sacramento.
He's still at his dad's.
We're still doing this thing, where he's spending the bulk of his summer at his father's house.
It's so strange, to be the visiting parent, to miss out on the day-to-day.
Gabriel is having a fun summer.
He's going to camp, and going camping, and learning to ride his bike, and swimming in the pool.
He misses me, but I imagine it's much the same as the way he misses his dad, not seeing him when he's here at home.
I can tell that this is harder on me than him, and I'm glad for that.
I'm happy that he loves his dad, that his dad loves him, that they are having fun together.
I'm glad that I'm having him every other weekend while he's at his dad's, that he's not just gone for the summer.
I wish the weekends I had with him (brother's wedding, boyfriend's graduation), were less hectic, more normal, that I had more hours to devote to drinking in this golden sunshine boy of mine.
I have him next weekend, and then he does one more two week stretch (that's three all together), before I get him back for keeps at the end of this month.
I miss him in my bones.
My mom and I drove up to Sacramento today, to capture Gabriel for as many hours as we could manage. I woke up before dawn and drove through the morning and picked him up just after 10am. We went to my brother's house, we swam in the American River, Gabriel had his first go on a rope swing, we went to the park, we rode a carousel, we ate popsicles and passion fruit, I brought him back sweaty and dirty and exhausted.
I'll see him again on Friday, but oh this day was nice.
Whole photoset appears here.