31 December 2010

Sleeping Babe

IMAG0249

IMAG0247

IMAG0246

Resolved: 2011

My goals for 2010 were fairly concrete, and focused.
I still have some debt, and I'm still not very nice, but generally speaking I made some progress on most fronts.

Well.

For 2011 I'm lowering the bar a bit.

Don't kill anyone.
Don't die.
Don't make the news.
Don't end the year in worse position than I started out in.
Don't intentionally cause harm
Don't screw up my kid.

EDITED TO ADD: FINISH MY TATTOO

Cheers and Happy New Year!

28 December 2010

Thing I Made: Bloomer Shorts

JimJams
This is the first OFFICIAL THING I've sewn on my New! Sewing! Machine! (I love it).
I used this pattern, which is free, and one of my top sheets, which was also free, if you don't consider buying it in the first place.  I don't use top sheets in my bed making routine, so they just sit stacked in my linen closet.
The pattern also involves ribbon and elastic, both of which I had on hand.
Oh.
And thread.
Obviously.
I started and finished this project this afternoon, so. One can do that.
It helps that it's been raining all day.
I haven't worked on a sewing machine in over ten years, so I would say the skills needed are minimal.
JimJams
There are lots of little Laziness Flaws in these (I forgot to finish one of the side seams, for instance), but I don't think it's really horribly apparent.
Maybe it's just not apparent to ME, for I have been drinking wine while I sew.
I think they're cute, and I'm glad I made them.  I wish they were a little bit (maybe an inch or so) longer.
JimJams
And now I'm worried that wearing these when the same sheets are on my bed will make me some kind of weirdo.
I'm also not sure that they're not a little TOO bloomerish, in a little kid way.  I mean, I know they're bloomers, obviously.  I just hope they don't make me look like a toddler.

Thing I Made: Knitted Clutch

Knitted Clutch
This is my version of the pleated denim purse in Boutique Knits (<-affiliate link).
I didn't knit it in denim, because I didn't have any (I used Berroco Vintage in cracked pepper, maybe 1/2 a skein (hank, actually)).
Knitted Clutch
Full Disclosure: I have become one of those jeggings people
The pattern (wrongly, in my opinion and as I now know), tells you to stitch the purse together right-side-out.  I followed the instructions, because I'm obedient, and I really wish I had pieced it wrong-side-out, as my instincts were urging me to do.
It really wasn't too difficult to knit.  The pleats at the top were slightly tricky, but only because I read the instructions incorrectly and did them backwards and had to take them out and re-knit them.  Had I been more measure twice, cut once about the whole thing, the pleats would have been easy enough. 
Knitted Clutch
The lining is my favorite bed sheet, which somehow got chewing gum on it (GABRIEL).  I don't have the laundress skills required for gum, so now my sheet is becoming other things.
Like purse lining.
Knitted Clutch
I sewed the lining on my brand! new! sewing! machine!
I love it.
I LOVE IT.
This is the first thing I've officially sewn.
I love it.
(I love it)
The buttons are from my button tin.  Because I couldn't find six matching, I chose six intentionally mismatched yet somewhat coordinating.
Knitted Clutch
The chain handle I bought, I think it was around $4 at the local craft store.  I attached that, and the various charms and such, with jump rings and some flat nosed pliers.
The charms are from my bead box.
Knitted Clutch
Is now a good time to tell you that I have a button tin and a bead box?  I also have a collection of embroidery floss, and another box full of rickrack and trimmings.
Spinsterhood: embrace it.
Knitted Clutch
This took me about two days to complete, probably about 4-5 concentrated hours of crafting.

27 December 2010

It's two a.m. and I can't sleep, so here we are.

*Today (technically today) is my grandmother's 84th birthday.  She is still as awesome as ever, so that's pretty great.

*Christmas went well.  Gabriel was OHMYGODSOFLABBERGASTEDAWESOME when he woke up and his dad was there, and it was nice having Gabey for the day so that he could do all of his Exciting! Christmas! Activities! with the other littles.

*I am embracing my spinsterhood.  I figure acceptance is the final stage in the grieving process.  I am officially A Knitter, my cat is nicely settled in, and I have given up on my hair and makeup.  Cheers to me.

*I don't have go to back to work until 1/3, and that is wonderful and lovely.

I guess that's about all.

Merry Christmas!

22 December 2010

Day 30 → A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself

-I'm compassionate.
-I'm close to my family.
-I'm loyal.
-I think generally good things about humanity in general.
-I have an awkwardly good memory.
-I'm generally positive and happy.
-I'm really good at choosing gifts for people.
-I'm smart.
-I'm willing to try new things.
-I have good hair.
-I have generally pleasing figure/shape.
-I'm fun.
-I'm funny.
-I enjoy doing crafty stuff, even when small children are involved.
-I'm an excellent editor.
-I'm honest.
-I'm very logical, and can generally see all sides of an argument.
--
30 Days of Truth

21 December 2010

Christmas Traditions (of mine)

CHRISTMAS SEASON
-Christmas season does not start until after Thanksgiving.  This is not open for discussion.

CHRISTMAS TREE
-Because I have a fake tree, I shoot for putting it up the weekend after Thanksgiving.  If I had a cut tree, I would get it later, so it would still be fresh at Christmas.
-I try to buy a couple new ornaments each year.
-I also try my hand at making a few new ornaments each year.
-We also have chocolate ornaments and candy canes.

VARIOUS SANTA CLAUS LORE
-First, we do Santa.  I believed in Santa until I was shamefully old (I think I was in fifth grade), and do you want to know what I think about that? I am so glad that I got to believe in something magical.  I remember thinking to myself how great it was that such things could be.  Like even when I found out that it wasn't true, I just thought, That was really great
-Santa fills your stocking, with various fun bobbly things, like bouncy balls and candy and whatnot.  Santa Claus is not the bringer of big ticket items. 
-Mall Santas are not the real Santa.  Santa is a really great guy, and a lot of people really want to meet him, so nice men dress up as Santa so that kids can pretend and feel good, but hardly anyone ever gets to meet The Real Santa, because he's so busy, being magical.
(Somewhat related: I am terrified of strangers in costumes)
-Even if you're a little bit naughty, you'll still get a stocking.  People who say that you might get lumps of coal or nothing at all just don't know about The Real Santa.  Real Santa would never be so mean, he loves kids, and understands that being a kid is hard, etc. (file this under: don't make promises you don't intend to keep - I don't threaten my kid with things that won't really happen, and while I might yoink dessert, I know perfectly well I'm still giving him a stocking)
-The wrapping paper that Santa uses for your stocking is one that you have never seen before in the gift closet or store or anywhere else.  Because only Santa uses it. Magical.
-Sometimes we write letters to Santa.  This is sort of dependent on my remembering to do so.

ADVENT
-We don't to actual Advent (because, um, that's not a part of my belief system).  But! We totally do an Advent Calendar, more as a COUNTDOWN TO CHRISTMAS OMG BECAUSE CHRISTMAS IS WONDERFUL.  For the past two years we've done the LEGO advent calendar, because I'm an indulgent mother.  I have a dream where someday I get it together enough to craft my own advent calendar and fill it with little bobbly baubles and such.

GIFTING
-I get gifts for my siblings, parents, nephews, and my aunt Rebecca's kids.
-I sometimes do something home-craft based for grandparents and other outliers.
-I make as many gifts as possible (knitting, making ornaments, etc.)
-Gabriel gets his stocking, a BIG PRESENT, clothes (if he needs clothes), Christmas Jammies (!!!), books and/or art supplies (if he is running low on either), and maybe one or two small things if I feel inspired.
-If Gabriel's grandparents send him money, we go shopping with it, and he gets to choose how it's spent.  I have veto power.

CHARITY
-This is the time of year I give to NPR.
-Second Harvest.
-Toys for Tots.

CHRISTMAS EVE
-We have dinner on Christmas Eve at my grandma's (dad's mom) house.  There we have dinner and gifts and et cetera with that side of the family.
-Christmas Jammies!  You get to open one present before bed on Christmas Eve, and there is a 99.99997% chance that this gift will be your special Christmas Jammies.

CHRISTMAS
-You may not get out of bed until your clock reads 6:00.
-If you get up before your parents, you may only open your stocking until they get up.
-You may not hassle your parents before coffee has been consumed.
-You must remember to say thank you, even if you don't like your gift.
-On my Gabriel-Christmas years, we go up to my parents' house after we've puttered around at our house for long enough.  On K's Gabriel-Christmas years, I still go up to my parents' house, only without Gabriel.

20 December 2010

Cutest Ever

From my super crafty friend Sara.
Wrapped in Denim
Wrapped in a denim pocket
Microchip Jewelry
Nerd Jewelry!
It's no wonder she knows me so well, we were cunning linguists together before we both leapt into library land.
She has always been this awesome.

16 December 2010

The One About Vegas

Last weekend I went to Vegas with a bunch of PEOPLE FROM THE INTERNET.  I'm making it an annual thing, I guess.
After I decided that I was going, I talked Briya and Julia into coming with me. Because, OBVIOUSLY.
We stayed at the event hotel, which was LITERALLY a Best Western with IKEA spilled on it (no really - the cab driver told us it used to be a Best Western, and I know what literally means).
There were vaginas on the walls, and bad 80s porn streaming 24/7 on channel 69.
Vagina Wall
Vagina.
Briya brought Skittles Vodka, which we drank, despite the hotel's lack of any ice machines anywhere.  The more you drink, the more it tastes like skittles!
On Friday there was a pretend bachelorette party.  We didn't make it there until late, because we were watching the remake of Hairspray.
I love that movie.
Watching Hairspray (the remake, not the original)
Drinking skittles vodka, watching Hairspray
Friday I was drunk to the point that I couldn't focus on the camera.
Briya, me, Julia
Not looking at the camera so much
And then I lost my camera.
I *think* I actually lost it in the Diva Suite, like maybe I stuck it in a swag bag and then left it in the room, or something.
Anyhow, if anyone who was there finds a black powershot, 'tis mine, please and thank you.
I also lost my I.D. at the club we went to.
I also licked Adam's face, because that's how I do.
Me Adam Briya
Adam's super glad he's my friend
Saturday DAY we were still sleeping at the time when one might attend stripper classes.
We took a cab to Panda Express, because you can't find that anywhere but Las Vegas.
I spent most of the day looking (and feeling) broken.
Somewhere in Vegas...
Over Hung
Saturday NIGHT Brittany and Andy got fake remarried by Elvis, which was awesome.
Julia made me take a picture with Elvis.
I do not like strangers in costumes.
At all.
Observe my body language:
The Most Awkward Elvis Pic
I was trying SO HARD not to make it awkward...
I got drunk on Saturday too, but  not QUITE AS, if you know what I mean.
Me and @superjules
I'm making that face cuz she's grabbing my butt
Then we woke up at 4:30am to make our absurdly early flight back to SFO.
It was really, REALLY easy to fly without identification.
I mean, I'm glad I was able to make it home, but for the big deal that airports make about checking your I.D. when you have it, they sure don't seem to care at ALL when you have nothing.
I showed them my debit card.
It just has my name.
No picture.
Like I say, I'm exceedingly grateful that I was able to make it home, but seriously guys?  If you're going to irradiate me and touch my labia majora, can't you care a LITTLE BIT about me being me?

15 December 2010

Thing I Made! Hat for Gabriel

This didn't involve...so much of a pattern, exactly.
I used a bulky weight wool blend yarn...I'm not good at remembering the kind, but it wasn't boutique yarn or anything.  It was maybe $4.50/skein?  I used one skein.
If you knit, here's what I did, if you don't feel free to skip the following paragraph:
I cast on 96 stitches, in the round, size 7 circular needles, did 2X2 rib until it was long enough (5"? 6?).  Then I switched to double-pointed needles, knit one round as K2 P2Tog, then I did a K2P1 rib for a couple rows, then I knit a round of K2Tog P1, then a couple K1P1 rows, then I just kept k2tog until I only had 12 stitches left, and then I cut of the yarn and pulled it tight and threaded it back into the hat. 
Anyhow, it looks a little wide and poofy, but that is because Gabriel has an unusual amount of unusually lofty hair.  On other little kids it looks how it is supposed to.  I think Gabriel needs one of those poofy hats to hold his hair.
Gabriel wouldn't let me take it off to photograph it, but that means he likes it, so I'm marking that in the win column.
Hat
Hat
Hat
Hat

14 December 2010

Day 29 → Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.

I hope I can learn to take more time to do things more thoughtfully.
I hope I can become more considerate of the feelings of others.
I hope I can learn to worry less, and give myself fewer headaches.
I hope I can develop more focus, and become less distractable.

Because I'm pretty sure that all of those things would make a better person out of me.
--
30 Days of Truth

13 December 2010

Look what I made: hobo mittens

This was my first knitting project that involved a cable needle.  There's a sort of vine pattern going over the back of the hobo mittens (or texting gloves, if you will).  Also?  First time attempting to read and knit to one of those chart thingies. 
And making something with a thumb hole was probably my most complicated venture to date.
I am legitimately adding to my skills here guys.
I will eventually work my way up to actually shaping.
Probably.
Pattern from Stitch 'N Bitch Nation (which is actually a slightly annoying book, because it's all CUTESY!!!1! But, there are some legitimately good patterns).
The yarn I bought on impulse at Michael's a couple years ago.  It's a soy blend, and I used about a skein and a half.  Very soft and cozy.  By the time I got around to pulling it out and using it a couple weeks ago, I'd lost the labels, or I would try to be more helpful.
Knit in the round and according to instructions.
Anyhow!
Knitting!
Yay!
Hobo Mittens
Hobo Mittens
Hobo Mittens
Hobo Mittens
Hobo Mittens

07 December 2010

21. Find out what my natural hair color actually is, before it's grey

Hair! Fixed!
11/19/2009
Hair, 12/7/10
12/7/2010
So.
Looks like we've settled that matter.

A User's Guide to Emoticons on the Internet

Created for you, Gentle Internet, so that the next time I use one of these handy symbols, you will picture what my face is doing, as you read my message of great import.

:-P
:-D
:-(
:'-(
:-*
:-)
;-)

UPDATE: I cut my hair today. So now when I wink at you, I look like this:
;-)

06 December 2010

Like a Cat in a Christmas Tree


This is why we can't have nice things...

Thing I Hate!

I hate it when people say things like, "There's an hour I'll never get back."

EVERY HOUR IS ONE YOU WILL NEVER GET BACK!
THERE IS NO RETURN ON THAT INVESTMENT!
STOP ACTING SO SURPRISED!

I mean, I get it. Waste of time, blah blah blah.

The wording bothers me.

Not quite as much as when someone asks if they can borrow a tampon, but still. It bothers.

Day 28 → What if you were pregnant, what would you do?

I won't go into the physically impossible because my sex life sucks aspect of this prompt, because that's boring.

Anyhow, pregnancy? Me?  Your guess is as good as mine insofar as who the father of this hypothetical fetus could possibly be, but:

1.  I'm on a No More Baby's Daddies plan
2.  I can guaran-god-damn-tee that it wouldn't be Gabriel's dad*
3.  It seems enormously unlikely that it would be someone that I wanted to hastily marry

THEREFORE....

If I were to turn up pregnant, it is really, extremely unlikely that said pregnancy would end with a baby for me, even though eventually (or even right now if my life was a tad different) I totally want more babies.

*I only clarify this point because technically if it WERE, that wouldn't violate my NMBD plan, just to cover all hypotheticals.
--
30 Days of Truth

03 December 2010

But WHY is your family so confusing??

Seriously. 
My mom has over 30 first cousins, and they all have kids, and (bonus!) we are in touch with all of them, and see most of them on a somewhat regular basis.
So yeah.
Family.
I haz it.

01 December 2010

Day 27 → What’s the best thing going for you right now?

I actually feel like I have a lot going for me right now.

  • I have a plan, moving forward with my life.
  • Gabriel is wonderful, and we are doing our best to tackle his issues with all of the available tools.
  • I have a super amazing and supportive family and friend base.
  • I am surviving.
  • I wake up most days happy.
  • Those all feel like pretty good things going for me.
--
30 Days of Truth

Christmas Wish List: SEWING MACHINE!!!11!!ONE!!!

Janome 7330 Magnolia Computerized Sewing Machine $349
Okay for realsies?  My mom's getting me a sewing machine (as pictured above) for Christmas.  And I! Am! Excited!
First, she offered to get me one.
Then, she let me pick it out.
Then, I did a freak of a lot of research on the matter, and narrowed it down to a couple that I thought were best for price/quality/my skill level and needs.
Then I bounced those options off a couple of my sewing friends.
Then I picked this one.

SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE this is the best present EVER.

Or at least, it's joining the Best Presents from My Mom Hall of Fame.

Current inclusions:
EasyBake Oven
Snowglobe
Scooter
Kitten
Snowboard
Madame Alexander Doll
Grandma's earrings
Pillows
Dollhouse furniture
KitchenAid Mixer (red)
--
(Link is affiliate, yo)