01 March 2010

Stress Stress

Money, sick family, the usual.
Gabriel has Hand, Foot and Mouth Disease. Which is blisters on his hands, feet, and on the roof of his mouth, plus extra bonus of contagiousness!  He's been out of school since Tuesday, which is starting to wear on us both.  My mom is helping me out with childcare this week, but I've still missed more work than I can really afford to miss, and I'm a stressball.

Which of course stresses me out about money, or what if I get sick?  I don't have enough sick hours right not to cover me getting sick with all the time I've spent off already, nor can I afford to not get paid for the time I'm out.  I recognize that I'm lucky to get paid time off, but the benefits are one of the reasons I take the lower wages.

Speaking of money, I've known since I moved in that my time will run out on this space in May of 2011, but somehow it only just occurred to me last night that I don't have any dollars set aside for a security deposit in a new place.  And in a town were you're often asked to fork over first, last, AND the deposit on move in? I don't think I can scrape together what could very easily turn into $4K in a year's time.  So that sucks. 

I HAVE been doing a very good job of leashing my consumer whore.  Instead of buying things from Anthropologie, I've stuck with meticulously updating my wishlist and pretending very hard.  It's surprisingly satisfying.  I've become a big fan of carefully building online shopping carts and then closing them out instead of entering my info. 

And I got a BlogHership for Blogher10!  Which is handy cuz otherwise I DEFINITELY couldn't afford to go.  Say hello to your new mic wrangler!  But. Ugh.  There's still all this "lodging" and "airfare" to fuss over. I know in my brain that lots and lots of bloggers somehow get companies to sponsor them for stuff like this, but my marketing know-how is less than zero, and selling mahSELF as product?  I wouldn't even know where to BEGIN.  Oof. 
I'm totally  going tacky as all get out, and I added a paypal button under my face over there on the right.  Its existence doesn't mean that I expect you to give me money, obviously. But, what can I say? I'm not rejecting anything either.

My throat is sore.  So of course I'm paranoid that it's about to be covered in blisters.  And I'm pretty sure that if I worry about it enough? It'll happen. So I know I should stop, but I can't.

In sum?  I need a nap, probably.  A nap would likely make me feel much, much better.