07 December 2009

Pipe Cleaner Craft Smackdown

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Don't mind me. I'm a goofy looking tree. Following the vague instructions made me look reasonably as pictured.


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My candy cane is inexplicably large. And I have feet.


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They say I'm a girl, but I don't know for sure. I do not have feet. Why does homeboy get feet?


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I have a backbone! Jigga jigga what?  I will kill you with my SPINAL COLUMN OF DOOM.


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OH HAI I AM PINK AND FLUFFY FLUFFY FLUFF BALL THIS THING ON MAH BELLY IS A MUFF.  Directions sez so.


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For an elf I am curiously tall. Who gave me these Christmas Uggs?  My tights are manly.


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Santa Pimp Swagga G. Where my hos at? We be pimpin. BUT OH MAH JEEBUS WHAT IS THAT???


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I WILL EAT YOUR BRAINZ
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I KILL YOU DEAD


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Um, guys? Do you know there's a boxing tree over here trying to kick my ass? Help a brotha out?


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WE ARE GREATER THAN THE SUM OF OUR PARTS. WE WILL HURT YOU BAD IN THE HEAD. SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH.


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Oh noes! Reindeer zombie creepo is humpin' on our Pink Lady.


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Eep!


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Confrontation is icky!


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I cut you with MY SPINE!!


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I KILL YOU DEAD


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Santa: That's our reindeer you jerkoff!
Elf:  Simmer down Santa. Simmer down.  Don't make me hurt you.


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You made me hurt you Santa. Me in ZOMBIEREINDEEROFDOOM hafta conquer the world now. No hard feelings?