30 September 2009

A retrospective of Gabriel's hair

By popular demand two emails: Gabriel's pre-haircut soft serve ice cream cotton candy hair! He got his first hair cut in October of 2007. Prior to that? He had this:

The happy couple

Snot nose

Eating crackers

Getting ready for bed

Gotta cut that hair!

Chasing a basketball
Also I asked LouCeeL to photoshop me into prettiness and he did.
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Almost Exactly Two Years Ago

Gabe at the park
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29 September 2009

Yesterday was not spectacular

Not that yesterday was bad, exactly, but there was decidedly nothing good about it either.

As I've mentioned on twitter, but mayhaps not here, a band of socialist hipsters (with a blog!) has captured the building across from mine at work. They appear to be hosting nightly raves, and playing BAD music during the day. Beyond that, while they seem very earnest, I'm unclear on their end goal. They tried to plant an agent in the bookstore, but were tragically unsuccessful.
If you wanna go to a socialist rave, I can hook you up.
There's one that's kinda cute. I mean, it took a day or two a couple hours for him to slip up and be out on the balcony sans swine flu mask, but he IS cute, particularly as compared to his competition.
Yesterday I was on break with a coworker, and he had been lowered down by pulleys in a garbage can, or however it is they're entering and leaving the building, and he was meeting some chi-mo van to re-up on supplies and clean chones and stuff. And he totally has gay wiggle butt walk! Which completely destroyed my idle daydreaming about socialist guerrilla warriors etc.

Yesterday was a bad day for appearances. I was wearing the WORK SHIRT OF UGLY PAIN, and I was in my white old lady sneakers, and since I didn't wanna deal with my unwashed chunks of hair grease, I had it put up kinda weird (read: old lady hair). I was also wearing my Cozy Sweater, which is sort of an old man cardigan with a shawl collar (are you picking up on a theme yet? An OLD theme?).
At some point I caught myself in a reflection.
"Damn," I said to a coworker, "I look like Susan B. Anthony."
"What do you n- oh. Yeah. Kinda."

And then because it was funny, when one of our student workers asked me how I was doing? I said, "Good, except for the part where I look like Susan B. Anthony."
"Well yeah, sort of, but it works on you."
Then I took it to twitter, and had the following conversation of AWESOME with Loralee:

So yeah. Yesterday. Not spectacular.

28 September 2009

Stalker Scheduling Tips

Various plans in the next.......couple monthsish?

*Either Saturday or Sunday of this weekend, Gabriel and I are hitching a ride with my mom to meet my brother Duncan for Hardly Strictly Bluegrass - Dunno which day yet, because I'm really just tagging along, but are you going? Wanna find each other? That could happen!

*NEXT weekend (10/9), Since Thursaday (the one with the tie) IS COMING TO VISIT YAY!!! Adventures! Adventures to be had! Oh Em Gee! He's not allowed to puke on my car, or get left in the gutter. Other than that? Everything's game.

*I'm getting more work done on my tattoo on 10/24 (happy birthday Dad!). I think Julia's at a USC game or sumthin, so I need one of my beloved San Franciskites to either go to the appointment with me (ideal) or at the very least meet me there afterward so I don't have to walk through Sketchy McSketchville by myself at dusk. So. Any volunteers for the Miss Grace Anti-Rape Escort? I'd be much obliged.

*I'm going to Chico (but, tragically, probably not Going to Chico) for Halloween, with Gabey. Stella and I are going to take the boys trick-or-treating, and go out after. I'm actually pretty excited about my costume (I'm making Kat hold my hand in American Apparel on Thursday so I can shop for it without being driven out by the glares of the skinny chic hipsters).

*I have another tattoo appointment November 14th, so I'll be in SF again. You know y'all love me.

*Julia's taking me to the USC/UCLA game! It's November 28th, and Gabe's with his dad for Thanksgiving this year, so that will be a very nice trip/distraction.

*I'm going to Vegas December 11th. With so many people it makes my head spin to start naming them. SQUEE!

So yeah.

In case you wanted to watch me while I slept Edward Cullen Style or something, here's a wee little schedule for you.


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26 September 2009

So I got into a bit of an argument with a friend of mine last night....

A wee little rant

1. We all know that I'm not K.Dot's biggest fan. We have a contentious relationship, at best.
2. A lot of my 'in-real-life mom friends' are single parents. Most of them have antagonistic relationships with the father of their child(ren).
3. I have a number of friends, friends whom I otherwise admire, who play an active role in keeping their children away from their dads, on the premise that the guy is a jerkoff asshole.

WELL. That pisses me right the fuck off.
I believe you when you say he's a douchenozzle, and I'm certain that he's behaving like one at this very moment.
But unless you are concerned for the safety of your child? Whether or not s/he has a relationship with his or her father is simply not your decision to make. You had sex with the guy. You had just as much to do with making that baby as he did. You determined that this would be the father of you child.
Therefore, you get to deal with the fact that he's an emotionally stupid asshat. That's a choice you made when you had sex with him in the first place.
Is it your job to keep your child safe? Yes. So let me be clear: I'm not talking about abuse situations. I'm talking about regular plain old I'm a single parent I do a hell of a lot of work and I can't count on this guy for shit situations.
It's not your job to keep your child from a relationship with her dad, even if it's because you're certain he'll end up failing her (and I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND the protective instinct at work here).
The way I see it, your job as a single parent (mother or father) is as follows:
*Be there for your child.
*Be there emotionally.
*Be supportive.
*Don't ever say anything negative about the other parent in front of or to the child, no matter how pissed off you are. That's not your job.
*Don't put the kid in the middle.
*If the other parent lets your kid down, by not showing up for the school play or not calling after dinner or WHATEVER, just be there for your kid.

Your child will grow up and come to their own conclusions about you, and about their other parent. Your negativity towards the other person in the relationship is not going to help anyone in the end.

It's not my job to come run interference in Gabriel's relationship with his father. It's my job to be there for him and help him understand his feelings if his father lets him down.
(To be clear, this is not a post about Gabriel's dad. This is about single parenting in general, and how I feel about it)
Please vote for Gabriel. Vote daily by clicking on this link.

Mom. 52.

My mom has taught me all kinds of useful things, although the most important has always been the value of family. Be there for each other. Support one another. Do the right thing.

I really don't have the words to tell you how I feel about my mom.

I love her.

That's all.

Happy Birthday Mommy.

Mom's graduation

Mom graduation

James and Mom

Daniel, James, Mom

Mom & Laura

24 September 2009

ModCloth Dresses

I want them all. I'm on a shopping strike until next season, at least*. Go forth and buy so that I might live vicariously through you.

Runnin' Out of Fools Dress, sizes S, M, L, $44.99

The Sublime Dress, sizes S, M, L, $52.99

Silent Film Dress, sizes S, M, L, $52.99

The Arcade Dress, sizes 2-12, $102.99

Hot Air Ballooning Dress, sizes S, M, L, $47.99

*Shopping ban exceptions include the following: Unbelievably good sales, Christmas presents, unforeseen needs.



I've never once regretted time spent with you, and I only ever want to see you more.

We went to dinner a couple months ago, and I was SO HAPPY TO SEE YOU. Plus you're like, a successful adult now, or something, and you drove me back to SC in your shiny Corvette. I can't believe I'm friends with someone who drives a Corvette. Who drives a Corvette and isn't a middle aged man going through a mid-life crisis? (And how is it that all of my college friends are Successful Adults with houses and cars and fancy jobs and graduate degrees and stuff? Don't mind me, I'm just the glorified secretary/single mom over here in the corner....seriously dudes, what the fuck?)

But I digress.

Good for you.

Without trying to go too whiny emo sadpants on you, I miss talking to you every day, and I miss staying up until 4am doing absolutely nothing worthwhile.

You're a level of awesomely good people that's hard to find.

I hope this year is the best ever.

Happy Birthday.

(And call me you asshole, I wanna hang out)

23 September 2009

My clothes say fuck off

Right now I'm wearing my STAFF/ASK ME shirt, my fat pants, my comfy shoes. Hair up in a messy pony, no makeup, glasses on.

What does this say:

1. I'm on day 10 of 12 consecutive work days.
2. My shirt is hideous, therefore why bother trying to pretty up the hair/makeup situation? I'm an all or nothing kind of girl.
3. I have to be on my feet. Comfy shoes.
4. I feel grumpy and full of yuck - fat pants.

I have two days off this weekend before another riveting week of mandatory overtime, and if I work up the energy to do something social and I don't feel too stabby about The World At Large, I might shave my legs and wash my hair and stuff.


Etsy - MD Sparks

I'm lusting after most of the jewelry from MD Sparks, and it's absolutely affordable, which only tempts me more (but NO MORE SHOPPING FOR AWHILE) (no really, I swear).

To name a few:

Queen Bee, $18

Don't trust me with a camera....


22 September 2009

Stuff I Bought Part Four - Old Navy/GAP for me

(Part One, Part Two, Part Three)

This is stuff I bought from The GAP and Old Navy for myself. On sale, plus extra 20% off, but even so I won't be buying myself anything for AWHILE (and this is the last post in this series, in case you were starting to be concerned).


Mira was one of the three girls in my high school graduating class.

And she's amazeballs.

And today is her birthday.

She's a good friend and she's adorable and she's hilariously funny and spectacularly fun and she's up for pretty much anything, provided you don't try to touch her dimples. But she has such wonderful dimples!

I love her to pieces and I'm so glad we're both in SC, and not just because she's one of my only friends in town who isn't related to me by blood.

She's better than lollipops.

Love her.

Happy Birthday Sugar Tits.

(Yes that's me and Mira, in high school, in costume for our Indian play. Because high school was full of Teh Awesome).

Con mi amiga Mira

con Mira

21 September 2009

Eric James memorial puts focus on mental illness


PORTSMOUTH — The standing-room-only memorial service held for Eric James at New Hope Baptist Church will likely have a lasting impact for many in attendance.
James, 33, of Portsmouth, went missing July 18. His body was pulled from the ocean Aug. 23. He had died while kayaking, but there was no doubt, given the word of friends and family, his death was due to the internal and external effects of mental illness. James was left mentally handicapped as a child from the effects of encephalitis, his family said.
Neighbors and friends shared stories of experiences with James, most noting his good humor and infectious smile. One neighbor referred to him as the "hospitality chair," the first to greet them when they moved in, candy in hand. Another friend addressed James' and her shared commonality, mental illness, and asked that people be more aware, open minded and tolerant of those dealing with an illness "which is not related to character, not (concurred) through sheer will," a theme that would become more profound as the family addressed the group.
James' brother Darwin read from a letter sent by a friend, which included a touching story of Eric playing cards with the friend and his wife. While playing hearts, James noted the woman's rising frustration at continuously losing and began openly throwing the game. By the time it was over, they were laughing out loud. Later James told the husband, "When you play hearts with (your wife) you should always lose. ...; You'll win something more precious."
James was born in Brooklyn, but moved to his mother's native France early on. He attended primary and secondary schools in France and Switzerland. French was his first language. He returned to the states, attending McIntosh College and Southern New Hampshire University, where he earned a degree in small business management.
Darwin later shared how as a tiny boy, struck by encephalitis, Eric fought to live, and later to overcome mental and physical handicaps, eventually exceeding expectations. Darwin also pointedly addressed Eric's illness, stating how exacerbating some of his brother's traits could be; his chattiness, or inability to foresee consequence of actions. But more important was Eric's incredible giving and innocent nature, his willingness to give people another try though he was often treated cruelly for his differences. Eric's sister Nathalie described a number of cruel incidents her brother endured, both psychological and physical. Our culture, and society have not reached a place where those suffering from mental illness or handicap can feel safe and included, she said. At the time of his death, Eric was experiencing intense despair, his family said.
Both siblings and their mother, Marie-Helene, addressed the loneliness and hurt Eric felt over the years, with few, if any, true friends outside his immediate family. "The community is the only place Eric could be lost or saved," said Nathalie.
Marie-Helene said we might not know whether her son's death was purposeful or an accident, but that he was clearly tormented at the time. He had come to a wall and was frightened by misguided readings of the Bible, which separated him from his loving family, she said.
Eric's sister left those assembled with a challenge — to be more like her brother. Our culture allows too many ways around decency, shortcuts Eric never took. "He maintained his humanity," Nathalie said.
In spite of cruel treatment, he maintained a belief in man's innate goodness through most of his life. She asked we all choose the right way and, like her brother, to be "more completely human."

Original Article


That's really the only word I can think of to describe the week ahead.

Nights of working until seven.
Bleary eyed mornings of wanting to stab anyone and everyone within knifing distance.
(I had someone call this morning and ask, "Are you a person?" (Really, that happened))
(I also had a ten minute conversation with a woman about whether or not her daughter would need a stapler. They're less than five dollars - either way I trust you to make a decision, and if you're that genuinely concerned, just buy the fucking stapler already)
It doesn't help that this year's edition of The Ugly Work Shirt has STAFF/ASK ME emblazoned on the back for all to see. Even on my break, wearing my shut-the-fuck-up-and-don't-talk-to-me face, people feel compelled to ask me how they can find Catholic services in the area. FUCK. Ask the damned Catholics? How would I know that? But I'm wearing the stupid work shirt so I have to be all friendly and pretend I give a shit even though I'm not in the building and am not being paid to give a shit and do not, therefore, have any shits to give.
Everyone's all unhappy because sales are down.
My union is FULL OF FUCKERY OH MY GOD JUST AGREE TO THE FURLOUGHS ALREADY I DON'T WANT TO BE LAID OFF GODDAMMIT DON'T FUCK WITH MY WORLD LIKE THIS YOU ASSHOLES. Plus the emails they send us are absolutely off the wall insane. I'm just WAITING for the one that tells me to wear a tinfoil helmet to keep the government from reading my brain BECAUSE IT IS EVIL AND WANTS MY BRAIN.
Gabriel was at his dad's this weekend because I kept him on Labor Day weekend for my Grandpa's services, plus I had to work all day Saturday and Sunday. My Sainted Mother picked him up in Sacramento for me, but I got him back and he was all FULL OF THE DEMON TROLL from being over tired and also I think he does a little better when he has every other weekend with his dad and (after this coming weekend) he'll have three in a row instead, and then he doesn't get any time with me or his cousins or his grandparents and I think that all fucks with his disposition. Plus I'm all crabby and incapable of dealing and also not around all that much what with the working.

Happy Monday Mother Fuckers.

Stuff I Bought Part Three - Threadless Tees for Gabriel

(Part One and Part Two)

I bought Gabriel four new t-shirts during the Threadless 9/9/9 $9 sale. The three pictured below, plus one that I can't find now. They're super cute. I think I'm in love.

20 September 2009

Weekly Winners - 9/20/09

Weekly Winners

Before Gabriel left to spend the weekend with his dad, he took the beds out of his dollhouse and put them in his castle so his guys could rest while he was gone. Then he made me promise to leave it set up so they'd be ready to play with him when he got back. Done and done sweet love.

Gabriel's Castle

Gabriel's Castle

Gabriel's Castle

Gabriel's Castle

Stuff I Bought Part Two - Old Navy/Gap for Gabriel

As I said, I've been comfort shopping over the past couple months. Here is the stuff I bought for Gabriel, mostly from Old Navy, with one shirt from The GAP. This is basically the fall shopping I'd have to do for him anyways, since he's actually grown since last winter. I bought a mix of 4T and 5T so I can hold some stuff back until a little later in the season. I bought it all with an additional 20% off coupon.