09 June 2009

Not Awesome At All

*I've been sick since Sunday night. Bizarrely, it started with a tummy ache, and turned into a chest cold? I think it must have been two unrelated illnesses, striking back to back, because I'm pretty sure those are relatively unrelated parts of my body. Anyways, not awesome.

*Gabriel I think has been sick for longer, but less so. I've been letting him sleep in in the mornings (that in in looks really weird, but I can't think of another way to write that - in sleep in? no), and go to bed earlier at night, and he seems to be having good days at school. Which is good, as I have no contingency plan. Anyways. Gabriel sick: Also not awesome.

*I have to work an extra 20 hours over the weekend. Which is not awesome at all.

*Word on the street is that we're going to have salary reductions after fiscal year close. Fuckers. I would so much rather be furloughed, getting paid the same amount for less time, then salary reduction, wherein I still have to work the same hours, just for less money. Fuckers. NOT. AWESOME. AT. ALL. Of course it's all speculation at this point, but when my boss is speculating TO ME, I take it pretty seriously.

*I know I've beaten this point to death, but I still.can't.find.my.camera. It's driving me nuts, because I didn't do anything WEIRD with it, or take it somewhere strange, or anything. The last time I know I had it was Wednesday, May 27th. I took it to Gabriel's first swim lesson. I got home, I took it out of our swim bag, I put it on the kitchen counter. I'm very certain of all of that.
I keep thinking of places where I could have lost it, like if I took it to the park and left it on a bench or something, but Gabriel was with his dad that weekend, so I didn't take him to the park, and I didn't go out that weekend, and I didn't have my camera besides, because that's when I first started bitching and moaning about it. VEXED. And? Not awesome. Not awesome at all.

*I've totally flaked and abandoned a bunch of writing I'm supposed to do, like the kind where I get "paid." And the more I avoid it, the more I have it hanging over my head. I haven't even thought up reliable excuses yet. Not. Awesome. At. All.

*An old classmate of mine lost her baby yesterday. It's so sad. I can't stop thinking about it. Because it's just so sad. There's nothing you can say, really. It's so heartbreakingly sad. We aren't close, but I just. It's adding an extra layer of sadness to everything I think about, because I can't imagine, but then I can't help but imagining, and there is no way to help with that kind of pain, and I just. It's so sad.


  1. Holy crap....you need...I dunno....vaporub? A sinister plot? A Snuggie?

    Suckage....major suckage.

  2. Life is shit sometimes. But it will pass. I can at least promise you that much. *hug*

  3. A friend of mine lost her baby recently. It is sad, always.

  4. I totally know what you mean about adding a layer of suckyness. Sadness like that is so heart wrenching and you want to do something...but what? My BFF lost a baby last year and it still eats me up to think about what she was/is going through.
    Sorry about things not being awesome right now...
    Hope you and the little guy are well soon!

  5. You need to get rid of the not-so-awesomes. They make a pill for that I think.

    My condolences to your friend. It's not easy.

  6. You're having a no good time sweets. I'm sending you a mental hug and will send boobs later.

    Hang in there, find something good about today and know that tomorrow is a new day with new opportunities.

    Really. It is.

  7. That is a whole lot of suckage. Hopefully it passes soon.

  8. here's hoping tomorrow is better and full of awesomeness.......

  9. yeah, not awesome AT ALL. Lets call today a wash... hell how about the week a wash already and move on the the weekend.

  10. Yeah, a whole crap load of non awesomeness to deal with is not good.

    But you? You are awesome squared and things will work out.

  11. I'm so sorry it blows so bad right now. Being sick blows...being without a camera blows even harder...and reduced salary, but not hours? So you can't even use extra time to work elsewere? Major blowing and sucking.

  12. Totally not full of The Awesome.

  13. Ohh, that is so very sad. Baby's lost. SO much of that lately. So sad.

    And I'm sorry about your camera. That would mortify me. I would cost me thousands if I lost my equipment, I'm terrified of that very thing all the time. I hope it's getting better for you.