13 June 2009

Let's vote!

Which of the following is most likely to give me an ulcer before the day summer is out:

1. My car, and its continuing inability to function, despite my continued dedication of cash funds to the Miss Grace Car Fund. Right now? It's doing....not....good....things. Not good at all.

2. My custody agreement. That I agreed to. Mainly on account of the aforementioned car. And it's....non....working....ness.

3. Talking to Gabriel's dad, who at eight o'clock this morning texted me to tell me that mosquito hawks don't eat mosquitoes. Apparently he's concerned that Gabriel believes that? And it's my fault? Gabriel's three. I don't really care if Gabriel thinks that mosquito hawks eat mosquitoes.

4. A combination the three.


  1. ALL 3! I vote all three. Hang in there. Hug

  2. Your son's dad obviously hasn't grasped the joy of messing with your child's mind by feeding it with misinformation.

    In my world mosquito hawks totally eat mosquitos.

    (Sorry for the car too. Hang in there!)

  3. 1. OMG
    2. ASSHOLE
    3. ASSWIT
    4. FUCK
    5. #s 1 thru 4 Will be held against you and me.

  4. Tell Gabriel that mosquitoes eat mosquito hawks.

  5. Oh man if he's going to start in on the "I'm concerned that Gabe believes this or that because of you" then it's going to be a long 18 years....

    I'LL be concerned when Gabriel starts believing that (a) lying is the best policy or (b) monogamy means whatever you feel like it should mean on a given day or (c) any of the other life lessons K is sure to teach him.

  6. Seriously? Call me crazy but isn't 3 an age where you can, and SHOULD still believe anything!!?!?

  7. I hate cars and their tendency to break down. My car fund is constantly empty, too.

  8. Your ex is apparently a little anal retentive. I'm sure he'll tell Gabriel that Santa doesn't exist before he's 4, because God knows how many kids that bit of misinformation fucks with.

    I also have a shitty car, since I decided I couldn't afford to write and pay a car lease. I feel your pain.

    On the bright side, you have glorious boobs. :-)

  9. Um... so why are they called mosquito hawks then?!

  10. I'm going to concentrate mainly on number 2 doing you in......

    Certainly causing a bunch of alcohol need!

  11. I'd say that #1 will cause the most issues because #3 is going to cause you to kill someone, not really get an ulcer.



  12. You can text that DOOFUS-MAXIMUS back that I -- for one -- am very disappointed that he's ruined my disillusionment of Mosquito Hawks and their ingestion of Mosquitos. THAT FATHEAD!!!

    That being said -- and in light of the fact that you have milk of magnesia clutched so tightly in your hand -- may I suggest a nice slippery nipple shot to wash down the chalky after-taste of the aforementioned M.O.M!

    The quiz answer? ALL BLOODY THREE, and the serious inadequacy of m.o.m!

  13. I'll go with option 4. Sorry to hear about the car. That sucks. Be ready for cabs next month!

  14. You should text him back:

    "OMG! So...like...does that mean that the Turkey Vulture doesn't taste like Turkey? Shit. Our son is doomed."

    I don't suppose it would look too good if your car was 'stolen' and accidentally used in a hit & run. It would kind of take care of both problems at once.

  15. I'll pick D as well. I'll toss in an unforeseen E as well to keep you covered.

  16. I say that all three will merge to form one unavoidable, unstoppable option, and when that happens....whew...time to open the door and bean a neighbor in the head with a potato...