"I smell a bad smell."
"Oh. I farted, sorry."
"Why did you have to make it go in my NOSE? MY NOSE? It SMELLS MOM."
"Check it out. If you would physically detach yourself from me for even five seconds, maybe I'd make other arrangements, but I've been holding you for two straight hours. I didn't really have a choice."
"Doesn't mean you should STINK on me. Not fair."
"Oh it's fair alright. You made me hold you while I peed. You're not an infant. I should be done with that nonsense. Whiner."