17 October 2008

Lilo & Stitch

Cody and I went to see Lilo & Stitch when it came out in theaters back 2002. I really love this movie. But Gabriel also really loves this movie, so I have some things to say now that I've seen it 745 times:

1. All of the kids are, in proportion to the adults, about the height that Gabriel was at 8 months old. Gabriel is not, and has never been, a tall child. I only know that they are creepy midget kids and NOT infants with curious amounts of hair because they walk and talk.

2. Despite Lilo's freaky shortness, I have deduced that she must be approximately 5 years old, based on the fact that she can read and write, yet unabashedly rides a tricycle. Given her age, WHAT. THE. FUCK. Her older sister Nani is Lilo's guardian (their parents are dead), and there's this concept pushed on the viewer that OF COURSE her sister is the best parent for her and BOO on Social Services for trying to intervene. But Nani is terribly irresponsible and frankly frightening. Lilo is regularly unsupervised both at home AND wandering around town by HERSELF. That? Not okay. So you're getting social security for your dead parents, and I know for a fact that orphaned little five-year-olds qualify for all sorts of social services, if you have to go be a waitress, yeah, it's a really really bad idea to leave your preschool aged ward alone in town for several hours. The government would CERTAINLY pay for some sort of supervised care when you were not available. There are tourists swarming your island home. Do you know how easily your little baby sister love could get hurt??? So I'm totally not supportive of that family dynamic. I don't think it's the best situation for Lilo at all.

3. You're struggling, overwhelmed, and never home. You apparently do not have enough time for your baby sister. You are apparently are struggling financially. You get a dog??


  1. Yeah, what is with the dog? Why is it that people who can afford it the least always end up with a pet? And then can't figure out why the fuck they can't make ends meet?

  2. You are killing me! I really needed a laugh today!

  3. Hey, hey, hey!!! Don't ruin this awesome movie!

    Next, I bet you're going to suggest that Cobra Bubbles is a less-than-ideal role model for all social services agents.

  4. Oh all cartoons are unrealistic. I noticed that when I was a kid and first saw the Charlie Brown specials. Those kids were in like what, the 2nd grade?? And they walked back and forth to school, stayed up all night in the pumpkin patch, went out of town for a spelling bee and wandered around in the big city, with nary an adult in site. WTF??

    Lilo and Stitch is one of my favorites because I love the whole broken family thing and the Elvis theme. When we go to Disneyworld this fall, we made reservations for the O'Hana character breakfast, which has Lilo and Stitch. I can't wait.