07 April 2008

I attract the most amazing kind of men

-The two best pickup lines I have ever heard-

Friday night, after the rehearsal dinner, at an Irish pub, from a Marriott security guard (in uniform), directed to my friend Kathy:
"Your friend is about to find out what 9 1/2 inches feels like inside of her womb."

Saturday night, after we had come home from the bars, from another wedding guest:
"Do you wanna go to the stairwell?  You know, to be alone?"

No thanks to both of those, but they were EXCELLENT tries.


  1. Wow. The last time I had 9 1/2 inches inside my womb I was six months pregnant.

  2. I would put my life savings on the latter being Pete. that's such a Peter Sage line it brings a tear to my eye and reminds me of college. Did I tell you he once had a threesome on a mudhill? Memories.

  3. You know it was Pete. In his defense I think he might have invited me into his room if he hadn't been locked out. And if I hadn't subsequently ditched him in the hallway to hang out with Kathy and Zack, Kathy might have felt like she could invite him into Zack's room to hang out while he waited for you guys. Poor guy, he's really pretty sweet.